HANZKY

One of my new year resolutions is to get fit, toned and live a healthier lifestyle. Of course I fail. I did the first attempt of trying to be healthier, that was to get my general health check up. Surprisingly I turned out to be healthy...and then after that I forgot all about the plan. In total, I stepped on the treadmill about three times for the last 6 months :(. My weight skyrocketed! I gained about 5 kilos :((. I definitely look chubbier and if I met relatives, they would ask the same thing, "Lagi isi ya Han?". My clothes don't fit me anymore, and I have a lot of clothes but nothing seem to fit just right. I'm tired of spending money and getting new clothes :((. I knew I had to do something but laziness took the best of me :(.

This morning, Mommies Daily published an article about Keluarga Nugraha, who are a household name for mommies bloggers as Astri, the mom is always been sort of an inspiration for all mommies. I took a peek to her blog and learned that she is on a mission to have a smaller waist and belly line. I mean, if you look at her, most women would kill to have a body like her yet she is still very determined to have a fat free figure. Despite living with 4 kids in Australia with no help of nanny, running a very busy, one women show catering business, some design projects, a garden to attend and gazillion activities, she still manages to spare 30 minutes every single day to step on the treadmill. It's a hard slap on my face that I always have 'How could I find the time to do it' excuse to justify my laziness. I guess I just didn't want it bad enough :(. If I wanted it that bad, I would find a way.

...what causes people to feed into their ego? Is it that gratifying to always be at the mercy of others' praise and admiration?

Or are they actually insecure that they need those as validation of their self worth?

And Twitter seems to be just the place for people wear their pride on their sleeves, people who would easily succumb into their ego faster than you can say RETWEEET!

Already? That means we're moving into the second half of the year next week? Wheww..where did all those time go? I don't even dare to look up to my 2011 resolution right now, afraid there's too many lists I haven't crossed :(.

'Summer' break is here. The kids are out of school and Jibran is enjoying his soccer camp. Jibran and Jehan are supposed to fly out to Solo on Monday morning...but there could be a slight change and I might go with them for the whole week. I have a few hours to decide.

Btw the layout is new :) and I like this one a lot. Changing the blog template reminds me about my college days where I could just spend the whole day trying to figure out the HTML code.

Workload is getting better, I'm still learning on not spreading myself too thin, because I don't want to experience the level of stress that hit me last month. I ended up eating too much and worried that I would never get everything done. I blamed myself for not being able to be there for the kids and cook healthy food for my husband. I had digestive problem and couldn't even stand a cup of coffee because it made me nauseated and gassy. My stomach tightened every time someone reminded me about work deadlines and I couldn't sleep properly, and I didn't even drink coffee!. I think that was the first time I experience what is called: stress. Of course, I shed a few tears too when it was dark and quiet. The moment where I miss my simple life back in St. Louis :'(

But I'm getting there, trying to sort out my priorities and try to live in the moment. I've touched base with the SLR camera and started taking pictures. I've splurged on an L lense and don't regret it all. It captures the moments I want to hold dear in my heart perfectly.

So what do I look forward to for the next month? Hopefully we can manage a short getaway because we desperately need a vacation. Oki is moving to a new company next month, totally unplanned and unexpected as he has everything going on at KG, but it's an opportunity he can't say no. What I love the most about this new company is the fact that it's located not too far for home and hopefully no more going home at 9 :). So that's why we need to squeeze time for a getaway before he starts his new journey because as a new employee, he needs to wait after six months to claim his leave.

I guess that's it for now. Tomorrow is Jibran end of year performance and we need to be there at 7 AM!!...ZzzzZzzz

*this was written on Sunday June 12 2011



I hope you had a good day today Jib. You've started off the day off with swimming (or more like splashing) at the insulated pool with Jehan and Nadira and ate fried rice for brunch at the backyard. Later on in the afternoon, we went to Pondok Indah Mall to get you the duck feet swim fins and to buy a few t-shirts for Jehan as she has outgrown most of her clothes. You wondered why Jehan clothes always become too small. I told you it's because at her age, Jehan is growing rapidly, just like you when you were her age.

Today is Oki's 32nd bday, too bad he has an office outing somewhere in south of Bogor so we couldn't celebrate it with a dinner or something. But I managed to surprise him with a present. The kids didn't have school today so we lingered around in bed after we woke up. Oki had to go to work so he took a shower, and that's when I prepared the bday present (as in wrapping it nicely, etc). Then when he was about to step out of the bathroom, the kids were already waiting in front of the door, holding the present and singing happy birthday :)).

After that, we went downstairs to have regular breakfast and went about our daily activities.

So happy birthday nduutt....hopefully when the kids think about integrity, honesty and dignity, they'll think of you :). I love you to the moon and back!!